Return to Y2K

Another piece of old writing that I found in a disused directory on my hard drive labeled “Beware of the Leopard.”

You’ll need to take yourself back to the heady days of the 20th century, when my entire industry was head over heels entrenched in the so-called “Y2K Problem.” It made some of us go just a little bit crazy.


Year 2000 Plumbing
Frequently Asked Questions

Version 1.1 – November 1997

What is the Year 2000 Plumbing Problem?

Every 1,000 years, the Earth’s rotation and axial tilt passes beyond the Prime Meridian, causing a reversal of the Coriolis Force. This effect is virtually unnoticeable to humans and animals, but effects the way water moves across the surface of the planet.

Up till now, water moves in a clockwise rotation in the northern hemisphere and anti-clockwise in the southern hemisphere. In the year 2000 at the beginning of the new lunar year (January 21st, corresponding with the Chinese New Year) the axial rotation will have changed sufficiently that the Coriolis Force will be split between the East and Western Hemispheres rather than North/South.

If it is imperceptible to humans and animals, why is this a problem?

I said “virtually unnoticeable” — not “imperceptible”. Scientific evidence indicates that some people experience difficulty sleeping, minor problems with the equilibrium and in some extreme cases, severe constipation. Generally the symptoms pass within a few days. These physiological problems are not, however, the cause of the Year 2000 Plumbing problem. In fact, constipation may actually delay the effects of the Year 2000 Problem.

The earliest recorded use of indoor plumbing is attributed to the Anasazi Indians some 950 years ago, but they consisted mostly of a large dry hole with a containment system deep underneath. The containment system was periodically emptied manually.

The modern “water closet” variety of toilet was only developed into its current form in England during the 19th Century by Thomas Crapper. During the entire existence of the flushing toilet, the rotation of the flushing water has remained constant.

With the Earth’s new axial alignment, toilets in the Western hemisphere will rotate anti-clockwise, while those in the Eastern Hemisphere with rotate clockwise. The result will be much the same as if currently a northern hemisphere toilet is installed in Australia — the water will be forcibly ejected from the toilet during the flushing cycle.

The original designers of the toilet simply failed to take this natural, inevitable change into account. (Or, if they did take it into account, they decided they would not have the nightmare of retrofitting when the Year 2000 came rolling along some 150+ years later.)

The problem is compounded by the extreme popularity of flushing toilets. The latest polls reveal that some 98% of all US households have flush toilets. Even in underdeveloped countries such as France, indoor toilets comprise nearly 40% of all restroom facilities

Are all toilets affected?

No.

Many “mobile” toilets, such as those on airplanes have been designed to work properly under any Coriolis conditions. Engineers have long understood the negative effect of crossing the Coriolis boundary where the results could be catastrophic. Persons in the process of flushing toilet while crossing the Equator could easily be drowned.

While airplane toilets use Brownian Motion to suppress the potentially damaging effects of transversing the equator, this is impractical in the standard home water closet, which does not have the added pressure differential between the cabin and the outside.

Another type of toilet that is unaffected is the newer “low water consumption” models which partially use suction to drain the bowl using less water than the traditional toilet.

*This document is not intended to be a comprehensive primer on Coriolis Force, Brownian Motion or Low-Water Consumption Toilets, for more detailed information on these topics please see the respective Usenet FAQs.

What must I do?

Don’t panic. Toilet replacement is a relatively simple process, but you should evaluate your exposure now.

  • Step 1 – Get a map, one which shows the Eastern and Western Hemispheres. Generally speaking, the Americas are in the West and Europe and Asia are in the East.
  • Step 2 – Locate your Event Points (an “Event Point” is any location where your plumbing swirls) The could be at your home, your work or perhaps your summer cabin in the Urals. Determine the following: Are you presently in the North or South and are you in the East or West?
  • Step 3 – Use the following chart to determine if the problem affects you.

    North/South East/West Year 2000 Problem?
    North East No
    North West Yes
    South East Yes
    South West No

  • Step 4 – Budget. Toilets, even Year 2000 compliant toilets are reasonably priced, but make sure you have enough money in your operating budget to cover all the expenses, and make sure you plan to buy enough toilets — don’t think you can just “get away” with replacing some of your facilities.

Are only toilets affected?

Absolutely not!

The inexorable laws of physics demand that the effect happen to any kind plumbing that swirls water (or indeed any liquid, except for certain NASA developed Coriolis resistant chemicals used aboard the Space Shuttle). This includes sinks and bathtubs; however, the ramifications of not completing Year 2000 conversions are less severe than those of toilets.

What about Swimming Pools?

A swimming pool is a unique case, standing water should be fine, and so, in general you can leave your swimming pool as it is; however, when it comes to draining the pool a unique problem develops.

Normally, a pool does not have a large drain, so that when the pool is emptied it rarely creates a whirlpool effect. (This does not apply to pools with a huge cork stopper at the bottom.) But, once the water level drops low enough, a whirlpool forms. Once it forms, it will be rotating the wrong way and the water will be expelled into the air, but not with enough force to escape the sides of the pool. Thusly, the water cannot escape and attempts to drain again, repeating the cycle.

Water evaporation prevents this from being a practical source of Perpetual Motion Energy, but a team of French scientists are further researching the possibilities. (FAQ Editor’s note: What a shame France is unaffected by the Year 2000 situation!)

Most pool manufacturers recommend that you drain your pool prior to 1/21/2000 and refill it afterwards. You will then have several years before you need to deal with the Year 2000 problem, and if you’re like most pool owners you will have sold your house and moved into a new house that doesn’t have a pool.

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