Love & Monsters, by Russell T. Davies
Davis Tennant and Billie Piper must have needed a couple weeks off from filming. The result, the worst Doctor Who episode ever made, including all of the Sylvester McCoy years.
At least it had ELO music in it.
[6/18/2006 – Follow-up. Now that my stomach has emptied, I’ve posted further on this episode.]
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The Satan Pit by Matt Jones
Let’s face it, last week on the Impossible Planet the Doctor was left in a pretty precarious position.
He and Rose had landed on an incredibly distant planet, “impossibly” orbiting a black hole. The TARDIS had not only been unable to translate the key glyphs that would have made short work of the mystery, but had then been lost forever in a seemingly bottomless gorge. As the plot unfolds, it becomes clear that the planet is the prison of no less than Satan himself, and that he is now awake and through possession has taken control of one of the crew and a legion of mindless drones, the Ood, who are now marching on the crew to destroy them. Meanwhile, the Doctor has travelled to the center of the planet only to discovered the Pit itself, which slowly opens…
After last’s week’s episode, the Satan Pit was a bit of a let down. It was still an excellent episode, which a tense and well realized plot of Rose and the crew escaping and defeating the possessed Ood, but the Doctor’s part down at the pit was slow, plodding, rambling and just generally worked against the episode.
Another problem was that, in the Impossible Planet, nothing yet had been resolved, so illogical plot points weren’t yet so obvious as they came to be in this episode. Most notably, when all was revealed, the villain’s plan to escape was overly-complicated, and could have been accomplished much more simply and no one would have been the wiser till after he’d escaped.
The Doctor’s waxing philosophical about faith and challenging his understanding of the universe were just plain dull.
Overall, it was a great two-parter, but the first part really shines with the promise of the second, and the second, on some level, fails to deliver.
Another point that was a bit down on this two-parter was the music. Doctor Who has never been known to have very good incidental music. The revival series’ scores have been (as far as I’ve noticed) all penned by Murray Gold. While the music hasn’t been bad, per se, through the new series, it’s always intrusive, and for the most part, derivative. It’s like listening to the soundtrack for the first episode, Rose, over and over again, week after week.
In The Impossible Planet/The Satan Pit, for the first time that I’ve noticed, the score is completely different with a cliched “apocalypse movie” sound, but it’s no less intrusive. I almost feel as if, perhaps, this score was done for the remake of the Omen instead.
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It’s no secret that, a few years ago, I bought a Mac and have subsequently dumped all my Windows PCs ad for everything I do at home – for myself, this just has never been a problem.
But there is one area where it has been a problem – work. I have no control over the VPN used to access our network and I’m not a fan of the software being used. One the strikes against it is that is PC only – despite the fact that it’s “supposed” to be browser based, it doesn’t work right outside Internet Explorer at the best of times and it certainly doesn’t work on anything other than Windows.
Well, so much for the brilliant concept of platform independence with browser-based solutions.
I have recently purchased this new Macbook with its Intel-based processor and that does open up some new possibilities. One option is Apple’s boot camp software, which allows the machine to be partitioned for dual-booting.
I’ll be damned if dual-boot Windows on this thing. For the very few things that I need to do in Windows, I’m not going to foul up the file system and waste the space for that.
What I did do, thought, was try the second option, a piece of software called Parallels Workstation. It’s currently in beta-test and can be downloaded for free. it allows you to create a virtual machine inside an OSX window and, as far as I can tell so far, it works incredibly well. The performance is good and the device support for the laptop works without problem.
For somebody out there thinking of making the (enlightened) switch to a Mac, but is worried about some old piece of “must have” software, Parallels workstation could be the solution.
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I’m beginning to feel like I’m heaping superlative on top of superlative for the season’s reviews of Doctor Who, but I simply can’t help saying that the Impossible Planet is possibly the best looking Doctor Who episode ever made. It is certainly, without doubt, the finest use of a quarry as a location ever, bar none.
Clearly the producers know it, too, as the follow-up Doctor Who Confidential episode concentrates on “the look”. The episodes sets and effects look like they belong in a very big-budget movie, but at the same time have a very convincing look to them. It’s truly stunning to look at.
If that was all it had going for it would still be an impressive episode, but it isn’t. Although it’s the first half of a two-parter and the story isn’t complete yet, it’s been great so far.
The Doctor and Rose arrive on an “impossible” planet – One that is orbiting a black hole. A mining team from Earth is there investigating the amazing power source that is preventing the planet from falling into the black hole.
It cannot be coincidence that this two-parter straddles June 6, 2006. The idiotically tenuous connection between 6/6/06 and the mythical mark of the beast, 666 is being played up as the release date of the new Omen movie, and even some seriously deranged people are trying to induce the birth of their children early in order to avoid giving birth to the anti-christ.
Amid this insanity in the real world, the Doctor arrives just as the beast awakes from his long sleep (imprisonment) in the black hole.
The story is thick with tension and the pacing is just about right. I’ve only a couple of minor criticisms. This first is that the TARDIS cannot translate some ancient writing found on the planet. Having made the TARDIS a miracle device which translates everything, this is a poor contrivance to get around not having the alien inscriptions understood too early.
it does raise an interesting idea that was briefly explored in the Christmas Invasion. As the Doctor recovers (not the TARDIS), suddenly all the humans near the TARDIS begin to understand the aliens. Clearly, the field generated by the TARDIS is not exclusive to the travelers in the TARDIS, therefore, does this mean where ever the TARDIS lands, all the people in the area suddenly begin to be able to understand foreign/alien languages. This episode explicitly indicates that written words should appear as English to Rose also, so does this also extend to all the people around the TARDIS?
One can only imagine the confusion if the TARDIS landed in a group of multilingual people, or somewhere where someone was studying a foreign text and suddenly could read it.
Alas, the TARDIS’ ability to translate has always been rather poorly thought out and inconsistently utilized.
The second problem with the episode are the bit where Rose is trying to cheer up the Doctor and get him to setup house with her. She really is desperate, isn’t she?
Finally, the Doctor has a “could a I hug you?” moment with one of the humans that’s just really stupid.
Now that the beast has awoken, I can hardly wait for next week for the Doctor to defeat him. Or perhaps he won’t…?
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The Idiot’s Lantern
by Mark Gatiss
Mark Gatiss, who turned in one of the best episodes last season has delivered again.
It’s 1953 London, on the eve of Queen Elizabeth II’s coronation, and an alien lifeform existing inside television plans to feed on the 20 million people anticipated to watch the coronation.
The term “Idiot’s Lantern” is early television-era british slang, much as Boob Tube was in the US. While, as far as I could tell, the term was never used in the episode, it’s certainly appropriate. The coronation was the first great push for the invasion of televisions into British homes.
Gatiss has really turned in a solid story, with pacing that perfectly fits the 42 minute episode. Pointless characterization is kept to a minimum and the scenes move the plot along rather than drive the often misguided attempts at moving the good Doctor from melodrama to drama.
Rose is not so annoying in this episode and actually does a good turn as a detective, before being eaten by the TV monster.
The conclusion takes place atop a transmitter tower and doesn’t half conjure up recollections of Logopolis. In fact, according to the Doctor Who Confidential on the making of this episode, one of the lines of dialogue that got cut involved the Doctor’s hesitation about climbing another transmitter tower. It’s a great shame the line was cut, because the second I saw that the Doctor had to climb the tower, my first words were, “Remember Logopolis, Doctor!” Some mention of it really belonged in the final version.
No, I don’t talk to characters on TV too often, but it says a lot of Mark Gatiss’ skill in that he’s written an episode that draws you in completely.
My only reservation about the episode is that, while I suppose I can buy the premise that an electrical creature feeds on the neural activity of the human brain and can, essentially, wipe it clean, I can’t quite accept that it also wipes their face free of features (like noses, mouths, eyes and such.) I’m certain that was just a concession to “shock” when the first victim is revealed on screen.
Despite the fact that I like Gatiss’ work, I really wasn’t expecting too much from this episode, but instead, it’s my favorite so far this season.
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Last season, my primary complaint about the new Doctor Who was that, episode after episode, the Doctor never saved the day. Today’s episode, the conclusion to last week’s “Rise of the Cybermen”, reverts to last season’s habit and I didn’t mind one bit.
As London falls to the Cybermen and the world looks poised to follow, Mickey Smith, that blundering idiot from last season, after watching his alternate self die, steps up to the plate (and with a bit of direction from the Doctor) saves the day.
While Mickey hard a great day, Rose didn’t fare so well: She looses Mickey forever, her “father” rejects her in the end and her “mother” is converted to a Cyberman. Perhaps it’s cosmic karma paying Rose back for being such a annoying person for most of this season.
The pace is in this episode was a full-tilt the whole time, mixing a good balance of running, danger and action. There’s also some well-realized suspense and sadness. There’s a touching moment where a Cyberman’s personality and emotions are turned back on and the Doctor kills her rather than let her suffer.
Just as he was getting useful, we loose Mickey forever in this episode – stranded in a alternate universe that conventional wisdom says can never be reached again. “Conventional wisdom” doesn’t hold up well in TV Science Fiction and I wouldn’t be surprised if we don’t see Mickey again, despite the odds.
Besides, unlike the Daleks which were realized largely with CGI, they spent too much money on those Cybermen costumes not to use them again.
This two-part episode is destined to be a Doctor Who classic.
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Crazy Jim’s has been just around the corner from my house for years, and I must admit, I don’t go there very often. Not because I don’t enjoy it, but just because it’s small, crowded and a little on the expensive side.
The picture here was taken in August when we made our first “review” visit, but I was not feeling well that evening and came down sick the next day. I felt it probably had impacted my enjoyment of my pizza and so decided not to review at that time.
Last week we tried again with more success.
Crazy Jim’s is always busy and they should be, they make a good pizza.
One thing I really like about Crazy Jim’s is that, for dine-in customers, they’ll only make a 9″ pizza. I don’t know why they do that, but I’d like to think they’re standing on principal: “Smaller pizzas are always better and if you’re dining in we’re going to serve you the best pizza we can. If you’re traking a pizza to go, you probably don’t care about quality anyway, so let them eat big pies.”
I’d like to think that’s it, anyway. In the absence of testimony to the contrary, I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt.
There’s nothing I’d classify as outstanding about their pizza, except that it’s consistently well-prepared and cooked. I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend it, but it is a little on the expensive side.
They also serve greek food which is pretty good, too.
9″ Pepperoni, $8.75 or $0.14in2 (0.138)
Conclusion: recommended
Crazy Jim’s Restaurant
4041 N 15th Ave
Phoenix, AZ
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Went to Z Tejas for Mother’s day. I’ve always assumed it was a pretentious, fru-fru place, and it turns out I was right!
One thing about pretentious restaurants, no matter how good something sounds, they always manage to find something to ruin it, some incongruous ingredient that indelibly stamps the chef’s unique perspective on the whole affair.
I settled on the Stuffed Pork Tenderloin
Medallions which is described as
pork tenderloin medallions stuffed with chorizo sausage, cheese, onion and poblanos in a roasted garlic cream sauce. Served with mashed potatoes and sautéed green beans and carrots.
It turns out that it was extremely good.
Pity there wasn’t enough there to feed an anorexic ant! The three medallions were about 2.5-3″ across and only had a .25″ thick ring of pork medallion left after the center had been hollowed out. Nonetheless, the pork was good, the stuffing inside was very good, the sauce complimented it nicely.
Good thing there was an ice cream shop nearby so I could fill up after dinner.
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The Doctor’s old foes, the Cybermen, are back.
Rise of the Cybermen by Tom MacRae is the first of a two-part adventure that concludes next week. It details the origins of the Cybermen. The origins of the Cybermen has already been fouled up enough in the past, with the whole what planet do they come from? Telos or Mondas?
The episode appears to answer the question firmly with: neither. They come into existence on good old planet Earth. (Although there’s still next week to try to tie it all up neatly. They’ve never actually called it Earth, it is set in London.) Despite this apparent gross continuity gaff, they’ve taken an extra precaution: This episode takes place in a parallel universe that the TARDIS has been stranded in.
In this universe, an insane genius wants to “upgrade” humanity to the next level: emotionless brains encased in metal bodies.
Meanwhile, Rose, who apparently a lot dumber than previously thought, just has to go see her father, who is still alive and very wealthy in this universe, and her mother, a bitchy rich woman with a dog named Rose instead of a daughter. The character of Rose has been really annoying this season (except for last week’s episode) and she’s staying true to form in this one.
Meanwhile Mickey has begun to develop a personality. Honestly, that’s bad for him. A tried and true crutch that writers use (some would say, “abuse”) is to take a secondary character and try to flesh him out a bit – just before you kill him off. I wouldn’t be surprised if Mickey’s days are numbered. Not only do we get to meet his dead (in our universe) grandmother, but we get two for the price of one. He exists in this universe, too, only he’s named Ricky. (Could it be the Doctor knew about this in advance somehow?) Ricky is the country’s #1 most wanted criminal, a rebel fighting against the evil genius.
Not a lot happens in this episode, but that’s a good thing. The 45 minute format really stinks for Doctor Who, with the villains usually being relegated to an afterthought and a momentary slight of hand for the Doctor to dispose of when time runs out. The two episode formats gives them enough time to set the stage and build some menace, allowing the second episode to run full tilt towards the windmills.
The new Cybermen costumes are pretty impressive. They’ve been given a brushed metal Art Deco look and they’ve built enough costumes to convincingly portray a small army. Earlier Doctor Who episodes suffered from three-costume-itis, where you could see obviously only 3 on screen at any given time.
Old series Doctor Who director Graeme Harper directs this two-parter along with a couple more episodes later this season.
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The Girl In The Fireplace
by Steven Moffat
(Definitely spoilers in this one)
So what happens when you take one of Britain’s finest writers of romantic farce and let him loose of Doctor Who?
Well if it’s like last year, you get the stand out episode(s) of the season, with the two-parter, “The Empty Child” and “The Doctor Dances”. While probably the tightest scripted and best-paced episode of last season, it also had the most sex – or at least sexual goings on – that’s ever been in Doctor Who. Captain Jack comes along and makes some overtures (not unwanted) towards Rose, the Doctor gets jealous, the romantic triangle builds. What else would we expect from the creative genius behind the series “Coupling”.
However, it was completely out of place in Doctor Who, but the rest of the story compensated for it.
Similarly, this year’s “The Girl In The Fireplace” puts the Doctor in a romantic situation with Madame de Pompadour, who, through a convoluted plot device has been visited by the Doctor throughout her life and comes to love him as she has no other man. The Doctor, too, seems quite smitten, and later heart(s)broken by the arrangement. Meanwhile Rose watches with jealousy and Mickey, on his inaugural trip aboard the TARDIS says, “I told you so.”
Anyone like Moffat who can write romantic farce has to be able to tie a script up into a nice, neat package and he delivers here. Even though it is an implausible situation, it’s by far the tightest and well-written script of the season, but, once again, just a little out of kilter with the rest of the series. It’s an interesting change of pace, and not as jarring as last season’s episodes.
3000 years in the future the repair robots aboard a crippled spacecraft feel they need Madame de Pompadour’s brain to complete their repairs. To effect that, they create multiple time portals back to her life on Earth, searching for the right moment in time when she’ll be ready to complete their ship.
Into this, the Doctor, Rose and Mickey arrive aboard the spacecraft. By stepping through the portals, the Doctor comes in contact again and again with Madame de Pompadour throughout her life. He arrives, and in typical fashion, saves the day, again and again. She comes to love him and it would appear he comes to love her.
When the time comes for the clockwork robots to harvest her, the Doctor gives up his freedom to travel in space and time to come charging in on a white horse and save her, leaving Mickey and Rose stranded on the spacecraft.
Clearly the writers are continuing a setup, driving a wedge between the Doctor and Rose, who, like in last week’s episode with Sarah Jane Smith, is getting a feel for what it means to be in love with the Doctor. Where they plan that to lead to, I do not know yet. It could be leading to Rose’s departure, or perhaps something that will make Rose all the more determined to be more to the Doctor – but she’d need to become a Time Lord to overcome the whole age thing, wouldn’t she?
Time, and further episodes will tell.
Next week: The Cybermen are back!
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